Negotiating Wants
By Dr. Chester Karrass

When you’re negotiating, remember to consider how the other party is affected by each action you take.

Suppose you make a large concession—thinking it will help resolve differences. Instead of being satisfied, the other party may react by making even greater demands. They may conclude: “If he conceded that much, then there is a lot more to be had.”

What each of us does or says during a negotiation affects, and is in turn is affected by what the other party does or says. It’s like a chain reaction. So where does all this lead us?

When planning your negotiation – either in advance, or like most people, ‘real time’ – consider the impact each of your actions may have on the other person. “If I say or do this, what should I do next, and what are they likely to do after that?”

Consider this list of ‘wants’ that are frequently present:

• They want money – goods – services.
• They want to feel good about themselves.
• They want to avoid being boxed into a corner.
• They want to avoid future troubles – risks – surprises – changes.
• They want to be recognized by their boss, peers and others as having good judgment.
• They want information and knowledge.
• They want to work easier, not harder.
• They want to meet their personal goals and needs without violating their integrity.
• They want to feel that what they are doing matters.
• They want to be able to count on you – now and in the future.
• They want to be listened to.
• They want to be treated nicely.
• They want a good explanation.
• They want to be liked and thought of as honest, fair, kind, and responsible.
• They want to get this negotiation over with and on to other things.

Review the list above prior to starting your next negotiation. Ask yourself, “What does this person (team) really want? How can I satisfy their wants and still preserve my goals?”

Constantly search for outcomes that exceed both your goals and their wants. This is the pathway to creating true Both-Win^® agreements.

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